The next day, the VIP arrived, greeted by the unmistakeable aromas of recently employed cleaning products. They probably should have given him a pair of bowling shoes for his visit because the floor was so shiny. Unfortunately he arrived precisely at the time when most people in the building were having a tea break. Even worse it was "biscuit" day so the tea room was heaving with human gannets. Hopefully the VIP was impressed by the clean but empty labs, and the high level tea room discussions being held between the motivated staff. Fantasy conversation-"I have been doing experiments through the night, and this is my first break for food and drink". Real conversation -"These custard creams are a bit stale aren't they?" or "I can't believe it. They finally moved all that crap that was outside the lab."
Ultimately my fate does not lie with impressing a big wig with the great smell of pledge. No the power lies with those anonymous folks who review my grants. Maybe they need their furniture polishing too?